Avast! US border scallywags be snatchin' more eggs than a snipe with a treasure map, ye salty sea dogs!
2025-03-21
Arrr, matey! What a yolk-tastic tale! Those US border swabs be snatchin’ more eggs than a scallywag’s stash of fentanyl! Prices be risin’ higher than a crow’s nest at $15 a carton! In recent moons, 3,768 eggy treasures, but only 352 of that devil's dust! Avast!
Arrr mateys, gather 'round fer a tale most eggshell-ent! It seems the landlubbers at the U.S. border have taken to huntin’ down eggs rather than the dreaded fentanyl, aye! In the midst of President Trump’s ramped-up security measures, them border rangers be plunderin’ more eggs than a pirate hoards gold doubloons!Ye see, since the month of October, these brave souls have seized a whopping 3,768 poultry-related treasures, while just 352 measly doses o’ fentanyl found their way into the clutches of the law! By me parrot’s feathers, that be a haul fit for a captain of the high seas!
And what be causin’ this egg-cellent escapade, ye ask? Why, the price of them fine oval treasures has soared higher than a ship's sails in a storm, with some scallywags payin’ up to $15 a carton! Aye, a carton of eggs now costs more than a barrel of rum—what be this world comin’ to?
So, as we sail through these turbulent waters of inflation and egg-snatchin’, remember the lesson of the day, me hearties: keep yer eyes peeled fer the golden yolks and yer wallets ready, lest ye be caught in the grip of a shell-shockin’ price surge!